Tuesday, December 7, 2010

SATs: Like a mental institution?

In class today, Ms. Serensky pointed out the parallels between the mental institution and life. More specifically, however, I would like to list the parallels between the institution and taking the SATs.
  1. Schedule: The mental institution runs on a very tight, strict schedule. The SATs also follow stringent guidelines. They must begin at a particular time and have a certain number of sections, which have specific time limits, along with the carefully planned five or ten minute breaks to eat or go the the bathroom. The  Nurse would be impressed.
  2. Rules: At the mental institution, if a patient acts out, they get shock therapy or have to undergo some form of punishment, including, but not limited to: humiliation, self- degradation, or fear. Therefore, most patients would not dare to act out. During the SATs, if someone were to act out, they would probably have to leave and they would lose their hard-earned scores. They would probably have emotions of defeat, humiliation, self- degradation, and quite possibly fear for their parent's response. The SATs have strict rules too. Test- takers cannot talk or use their phones. If their phones make a sound, they must leave. Not to mention an attempt at cheating. Students must just sit there, focused and silent, while they take the test. Like machines...
  3. Head Person: The Big Nurse evokes fear in her patients. She watches them, trying to catch their every slip-up. She has “precise, automatic gesture[s]”(5).  During the SATs, the people in charge, or The Proctors, have watchful eyes. They dare you to cheat and they take no shortcut in making sure that you do not. They read from the master book, giving precise, clear, and detailed instructions, with an air of authority. They keep the test takers in line.
  4. Emotions: The SATs fill a typical student with a variety emotions which are quite similar to those of a mental patient.
    1. Paranoia: Will my batteries run out?  What if my pencil breaks? What if I need to go to the bathroom? What if my phone goes off?-- Oh good I left it in the car--- Do I have anything on me that makes noise? My calculator would not make a sound, would it? Is it even the right type of calculator? Oh gosh-- What If I get kicked out?
    2. Anxiety: Is the answer a or c? Oh shoot--- They say you should guess c, right? I would only lose ¼ of a point if I got this wrong... But what if I fail? What if I do not finish?
    3. Fatigue: Just... keep... going...-- the mental patients were fatigued from fighting the endless brainwashing. Test takers die from the endless questions (These could actually brainwash also; some believe that students should learn more about creative thinking than how to answer test questions).
Overall, the SATs can be just as draining and detrimental as a mental institutions (this is, of course, a hyperbole). I came out of them feeling brain- dead, tired, and slightly disoriented (does this sound anything like shock therapy to you?). However, unlike this particular mental institution, my scores will actually help me in life because they will get me into a good college (or am I just as brainwashed as the mental patients...?). 

Note: I have actually had some very nice proctors on my various standardized test. I do not mean to stereotype.
Note 2: Yes, I do undergo emotions of paranoia and anxiety during the test, but I may have exaggerated slightly. I usually bring spare batteries and pencils, so these are not a concern. And I knew I would not fail. I swear I am not crazy.

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